When the sun shines on the blond hair, it glitters like gold…but how long the sun will shine in the western world and will it still remain gold even when its gloomy…having tasted both traditional Indian and superfluous western life…I thought I can put forth my thoughts and compare the two contrasting ways of life…The thoughts are solely my opinion and not to hurt anybody’s feelings and can be debatable..;) The westerner always complains about Indian way of arranged marriages…the Indians always complain about the westerner’s life with many partners….when I look at the gross root level of both the life….there are plus and minus in both…
The westerner has a great possibility to choose from a wide variety of pool, his true soul mate…but if he/she is his/her true soul mate….why they don’t stick together forever…was it just superficial and Hippocratic ?…. Life is all ups and downs….all days are not sunny….a typical westerner wants everyday to be sunny…is it possible? Life is not always filled with happy moments…In fact your true soul mate is judged during your difficult times…Given the freeness and the independence from the society, they are able to behave more cranky and create more problems for themselves…the ultimate result is divorce… the amount of tolerance which a westerner have is very minimal…so when it comes to real life situations, they were not educated in a way to make compromises…
Since the society offers more freedom, they were in a position to do and try things which is quite abnormal ;) I bet the ultimate challenge for a westerner is to retain his girl friend/partner… Can life be lead all the way with this only challenge? That’s why they tend to give up this challenge and concentrate on other things…or probably in search of other partners because of the freeness in the society ;) The end result is “My Children and Your Children are playing with Our Children”.
Coming back to traditional Indian way of life…do you really choose your true love if you bring various factors of caste, religion, color, societal status, income and the assets when choosing a girl? Even after finding their true love, do they receive adequate support and tolerances from the society?... but still how do the relations survive for long time in Indian societies?...simply because Indians are trained to accept compromises and educated from the younger age to face difficult and hostile situations and live for the society and not for them…but if you give the same amount of western independence in an Indian society….I bet the percentage of divorces in India will be the maximum in the world ;) They are basically entangled in a situation where they can not come out of this vicious circle of marriage and society….so they tend to persist and stay even though the situation is not ideal and cherishing…but the question is how far is the threshold…
The most important thing which keeps Indian family moving is their nuclear structure. The affinity between the parents and the children in Indian families is considered as the most important aspect for long standing love and affection….a simple fact in Western society is the child sleeps alone after 3 months of birth…the westerners are trained to be more independent, so the feel for others doesn’t start even at the younger age…how can you expect that to happen with a person whom you meet in your lustful days that too in this materialistic world…What keeps life going after 30s and 40s is the family even though many argue career, money will be of high importance…
So its not ideal to compare both the sides of a coin, it totally depends on the mentality and attitude of each individuals how they are trained and programmed and brought up…as long as happiness and peace is guaranteed, any way of leading a life is charming and interesting…A typical Westerner believes “finding your soul mate is a continuous process of life” while an Indian argues “finding your soul mate is a one-time job of your life” ….having tasted both the dishes what I can say is “finding a soul mate is something god’s gift” :)
Cheers,
Sathish Kumar
When the sun shines on the blond hair, it glitters like gold…but how long the sun will shine in the western world and will it still remain gold even when its gloomy…having tasted both traditional Indian and superfluous western life…I thought I can put forth my thoughts and compare the two contrasting ways of life…The thoughts are solely my opinion and not to hurt anybody’s feelings and can be debatable..;) The westerner always complains about Indian way of arranged marriages…the Indians always complain about the westerner’s life with many partners….when I look at the gross root level of both the life….there are plus and minus in both… 
4 comments:
This is interesting view on both sides of marriage. I have to agree with you that surviving the marriage is up to the individuals. I guess the 'one to one' does exhibit only in paper as far Indian marriage concerned. Given a freedom to choose, we will be adopting sooner than expected. Needless to point out, there are lot of marriages that survives in here too. It is really One's luck to end up with right person.
well, I dont understand what is your conclusion. But, I agree with Mr. Siva Jeganthan. I personally think it is upto the individual and your (as well as your partners) abily to compromise in a relationship. I have also met many blond German girls (as per your German stereotype :-P) who have made many compromises in a relationship. For them it not the compromises which matters but the person for whom they make the compromises. As you would find in any situation, there are always advantages and disadvantages. As long as you remain a roman in Rome, everything will be fine. This is a major problem with us (most Indians, for that matter most foreigners) in an alien land. We tend to compare both cultures and loss our way in life. I would say, be an Indian or adopt the alien culture, but dont compare them and confuse yourself. If thats the case, you will not be an Indian or German (or belong to any culture).
Hello Friend,
I really admire your efforts to chronicle every incident of your stay in Germany. May be someday you should think of publishing it as a book , similar to Subhash's autobiography likesay " An Indian pilgrim". I am proud of being your classmate.
Vazhaga SVCE.
Hello Friend,
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